How Much Are You Missing?
Do you ever stop to think about what you may be missing since the arrival of such technological devices as the smartphone? Certainly you aren’t missing a call, text or email. Not a facebook status or tweet. But maybe you are missing something more. I think I am
Yesterday as I stood in line at the grocery store, I experienced that familiar itch. The one I get these days whenever there is a dull moment, an empty space, a lull in the conversation. That irresistible urge to get lost in my smartphone with its constant beckoning to new information, as inane and unnecessary as much of that information may be. Never mind the fact that I had checked my phone just before coming into the store, that urge was as strong as ever. And yet I resisted.
I refused to pull my phone from my pocket, forcing myself to look around. To be present. In the moment. Present in the grocery line. It may sound silly, but honestly, how often are any of us truly present any more?
As I stood there taking in the sights and sounds of carts and customers, I couldn’t help but notice the people in the line next to me. An elderly woman, her husband and their teenage granddaughter. The white-haired, able-bodied woman was unloading her cart. Her husband was behind her, slumped at the shoulders and seated in a wheelchair. Their long-haired, pony-tailed granddaughter who radiated innocence was commandeering the wheelchair.
I noticed as the young girl picked up a specialty chocolate bar from one of the racks near the check-out. “Look Grandpa!” she said. “This chocolate bar has bacon in it!” She smiled and laughed.
Her grandfather didn’t react; or if he did, it was so slight as to be unnoticeable. Instead her grandmother turned around after hoisting a bag of corn onto the checkout belt and said, “Bacon?!” She too laughed then shook her head.
My turn came, and I lost track of them as I unloaded the contents of my cart. But as I left the store, I saw them again. Grandma and granddaughter were working together to the get the stiffened old man into the front seat of the car. Working together to collapse the wheelchair so it could fit in the trunk.
And what stood out to me the whole time was the young girl. She didn’t look irritated about spending the day at the grocery store with her grandparents. Didn’t look distracted. She looked perfectly content, like there was no place she’d rather be and nothing she’d rather be doing than pushing her grandfather around, pointing out odd chocolate bars and folding up his wheelchair.
I saw a glimpse of myself in that girl. A glimpse of myself in days gone by when my only concern was doing simple things to help the people around me. Before life became more complicated. Or else, before I allowed it to become more complicated.
What I witnessed in that store was a simple moment. Nothing about it screamed for my attention. Yet it was beautiful in its simplicity. Had I given in to the “smartphone itch” I would have missed it.
As I turned the corner of the parking lot toward my car, I saw another woman, shopping bag in one hand, smartphone in the other. She held the screen in front of her face and was squinting into it, trying to read its secrets despite the bright sunshine. She smiled and laughed to herself, unaware of the myriad of stimuli around her.
How many times have I been that woman? And how much have I missed because of it?
Of course, I thought these things right before dropping my bags into the trunk, getting inside my vehicle, turning on the AC and doing what? You guessed it — checking my smartphone. Lord, have mercy on me!
I have a lot to learn, a long way to go, but for a moment, I was free. Free to see. I long for more moments like that one. Do you?
I love it Lindsay! This is so very true and a very powerful message to all of us. Sometimes I leave my phone home on purpose and I feel so free! When I was raising my kids, my phone was attached to the kitchen wall, so when we left the house, we left the distractions and interruptions behind. I miss those days!
I miss those days too and agree that it’s important to leave the technology behind sometimes! It’s hard to believe that the current generation will have no idea what it was like before portable technology was part of every moment of the day. In many ways, I feel sad for them. At least we can make the comparison.
Guilty as charged! I spend a lot of time with my nose in electronics, either at home or on the go. I’m sure I miss a lot of things. But like you, I sometimes get a glimpse of the life around me and soak it in. And if I’m with anyone, I always try to keep my phone put away and be present with them. Thanks for a great reminder!
Yes, Linda, one of the WORST things is to be out with someone trying to have a conversation and have them texting or checking their messages. I try to be mindful of this as well. It’s amazing how many times you go to restaurants and see people at opposite sides of the table buried in their phones and ignoring one another!
I’ve only recently upgraded my phone to one that can do a lot more than my old one did – but even though I don’t know how to use all the apps and possibilities, I did feel that ‘smart-phone itch’ the other day while at the park with my son. How easy it is to amuse ourselves rather than being in the moment. Not just to notice people, but to be truely with them.
Penny, one recommendation I can give you as a new smartphone user and one that helped me immensely once I discovered it, is to turn off the feature that makes a sound/buzz every time you receive an email message. In my first month with my smartphone, every time the phone would beep to indicate I had a message, no matter what I was doing, I’d feel the need to check it. Oftentimes, it would be nothing more than junk mail, but that sound would make me feel like I needed to check it right away. I have since disabled that feature and now I just check my messages at intervals throughout the day, but I don’t jump every time I hear it make a sound! That has helped me immensely!
This is one of the reasons I don’t have a smartphone. Actually, I don’t use my cell phone unless it’s an emergency. I refuse to become a slave to it.
I was a hold-out for a long time, but with all the travel I do for work, my husband wanted me to have one. It definitely has its advantages, like when I’m on the road and need to find a nearby place to stop and eat. But it has its drawbacks too. Learning to control it and not let it control you is so important!