Raising kids is not an exact science. It’s more like trial and error, with an emphasis on error. After two decades of mothering, I’ve learned some lessons that are worth passing along. Perhaps some of  the young moms out there can learn faster than I did.  

Lesson One: Things don’t always go the way you want them to.

At 26, I was ready to take on the exciting role of being a mom to my baby boy. I  felt prepared for the task, but things didn’t go the way I thought they would. I planned on breast feeding, but my milk didn’t come in like it was supposed to. My mom-friends were wearing triple E maternity bras, producing milk that would make Bessy the Cow envious. But me? I looked like one of the seven thin cows in Pharaoh’s bad dream! After six weeks of La Leche intervention, I was utterly (pun intended) exhausted. My mother-in-law made a suggestion—formula. It satisfied my baby’s tummy, so he and I finally got the rest we desperately needed. When things don’t go the way you want them to, try experiment B. 

Lesson Two: Kids do not need to be raised in a sterile environment.            

I’m a clean freak. It’s not that I mind dirt—I just mind it in my house. Before I had kids, I polished doorknobs, scrubbed grout with a toothbrush, and cleaned the inside of my oven with an S.O.S. pad.  My floored shined and my mirrors sparkled. Fast forward seven years. With three kids in the house, it was impossible to maintain my sterile standards. Crushed Cheerios embedded in the carpet, finger Jell-O spackled on the high chair, and grains of sand in little shoes were common sights in my less than perfect home. I eventually realized that messes and dirt are a part of raising kids. I decided I would clean the house when my kids went to college, and that day came sooner than I was ready.While raising kids, your house may not be as clean as you’d like it to be, but it will be clean enough.

Lesson Three: What works for one child, may not work for another.

Though my kids have similar physical features, they are nothing alike on the inside. Therefore, my parenting formulas had to be tweaked with each child. I thought that my successful experiments with child A would produce the same results with child B and C. Not so much. My kids had different emotional needs, different interests, and different personalities. Any mother who has more than one child will attest to this mystery. Even though they come from the same parents, no two are alike. I learned to embrace their differences and enjoy the special bond I had with each one. Psalm 139:13-14 says that God created us wonderfully complex and unique. Each of your kids was uniquely created by the Master Scientist—and his formulas are always perfect!

CRYSTAL