Raising children is a lot of hard work. It also needs to involve plenty of fun. Is there a way to do both? What can the lives of Almanzo Wilder and the pioneers teach us about the answer?

In her book Farmer Boy, Laura Ingalls Wilder devoted an entire chapter to the glorious days of the county fair. The sights and sounds and smells fill the pages and our hearts. The road to the county fair, however, had been filled with labor, from planting and hoeing to tending and nurturing.

Almanzo’s sisters took their best jellies to the fair. As excited as his sisters were, it’s doubtful anyone was as excited—or as nervous—about a contest entry as Almanzo was over his milk-fed pumpkin. Ever since summer, he had carefully tended what he hoped would be a prize-winning pumpkin in the fall. He could think back to the first day he had begun to care for it. His father had helped him pick out the very best of all the pumpkin vines. Carefully, they had pruned it until only one branch and one yellow blossom remained. Ever so carefully, they cut a slit on the side of the vine closest to the ground. Almanzo dug out a special spot for a bowl to set underneath the vine, filled the bowl with milk, and threaded a candle wick from the bowl into the slit he had made.

Every day he had to replenish the milk in the bowl, for his hungry pumpkin kept drinking as much as he gave it. It grew bigger and bigger right before his eyes. When it finally came time to move it into the barn until everyone was ready for the fair, Almanzo couldn’t lift it an inch. All he could do was cut it and leave the rest up to his father.

When the judging day for his pumpkin finally arrived, Almanzo could hardly stand the wait. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t think. He just wanted his pumpkin to win. He watched contestants in other competitions win and lose. Those who didn’t win always congratulated those who did. He figured he would have to do the same, even if he didn’t really want to.

At the last moment, the judge stuck the blue ribbon into his very own milk-fed pumpkin! Almanzo couldn’t have been happier. That’s when the judge asked how he had ever gotten one to grow so large. Almanzo paused. What if he had broken the rules without knowing it? He tried to think of some way he could avoid admitting he had fed it with milk. But he couldn’t come up with anything. Everything he thought of was dishonest. Finally, he admitted it. To Almanzo’s relief, the judge said milk-fed pumpkins were certainly allowed!

The county fair was a fun time for the entire Wilder family, but the awards they won and the reward for their labor only came after months of hard work. How can that help encourage parents and children on their journey?

Almanzo’s father helped him set a clear goal and continue on until he reached it. Almanzo’s goal was to have a pumpkin worthy of entering in the county fair. Part of him wanted that pumpkin to win the blue ribbon, of course, but the goal was clear and attainable—grow the best pumpkin he could grow and take it to the fair. To do that, he needed to do several things:

• He needed to work hard. Every morning, that pumpkin needed fresh milk. He couldn’t forget about it or promise to do it later. He had to work toward the goal every day.
• He needed help. He couldn’t get his pumpkin to the fair without the help of his father.
• He had to be willing to take a chance. He might not win. If he didn’t, he knew he’d have to be prepared to swallow his pride and congratulate the winner.
• He had to wait for the results. All during the long months the pumpkin grew, Almanzo had to keep pressing on toward his ultimate goal, not knowing what the results would be.

When the time for the county fair came, Almanzo and his family took three days off of their busy schedule and enjoyed the fair together. Even if Almanzo hadn’t won the blue ribbon for his pumpkin, the fair was full of other beautiful memories. He had the opportunity to spend special time talking to his father about horses. He saw new things like Belgian horses and a mule for the first time. The family celebrated, visited, ate, and had fun.

You and your child are on the journey of growing and changing together. You can help your child enjoy the journey by setting attainable goals. What does your child want to accomplish? Help them identify it and move toward it a little bit each day. Spend plenty of time in prayer talking to God and your child about these goals, both before you make them and as you travel on the journey.

When they reach their goal, stop. Celebrate their accomplishment. Most of all, celebrate them and the great love both you and God have for them. Enjoy the special moments with your child. No matter how much work there is to be done, never forget to make room for fun.