What does it take to turn our children into confident and content young adults? I don’t claim to know all the ingredients that should go into the mixing bowl of growing our children up right, but I do know that one of the key ingredients is one-on-one time with them as children.

As I looked for a photo to use for this blog post, I first searched for “parent and child” pictures and was disappointed to see so many scolding scenes. One-on-one time is for building the child up and helping them to take pride in themselves. Scolding is off limits during these special one-on-one times.

Even with large families, and perhaps all the more so, one-on-one is what helps assure each child of his/her value as a person when a parent (or grandparent) makes the time to get to know the child and enjoy some kind of activity with them on a regular basis. Suzanna Wesley homeschooled her 10 children, yet found a way to maintain a day of the week for each of the older children to have special conversation with her. Several of her children became great leaders when they became adults.

I’ve noticed more than one father-daughter video on Facebook recently with dads practicing cheerleader routines with their daughters. And a recent radio program shared ideas on ways fathers could plan a “date” with their very young daughters who enjoyed the opportunity to dress up and spend some talking time alone with dad. Check out this date with dad program from Focus on the Family.

One of my favorite children’s books is Grandpa’s Face by Eloise Greenfield. This book illustrates beautifully how helpful the relationship between Grandpa and his grandaughter Tamika was with their “talk walks.” Listen to the story on YouTube here.

Below are a few starter ideas for spending special time with a daughter, son, granddaughter, or grandson:

• picnic
• children’s museum
• skating
• bicycling
• hiking
• fishing
• visit a trampoline park
• cooking
• exercise together
• reading a book together
• playing in the snow, …rain, …leaves, …sprinkler, (weather oriented fun)
• shopping
• visiting a shut-in together (don’t lose the one-on-one here, follow up with discussion about the visit and whatever else the child wants to discuss)

Please share your ideas in the comments below on ways you have found to spend quality one-on-one time with your child or grandchild.