After my time with the Lord this morning, I changed what I planned to write today. I’ve been going through Kristi Mclleland’s study entitled “Jesus and Women.” This morning, she taught about a tear jar vessel. The woman who washed Jesus’ feet with her tears may have had a container specifically designed to hold her tears. What an odd thing to carry around.

I thought about how we hate to have others see us cry. I especially try not to let children see my tears. In public, I’m embarrassed if my eyes water. I have been guilty of telling my children and grandchildren to stop crying. Yet, Jesus understands our tears and even welcomes them. In the Bible, tears are significant to God. How can we teach that to our children? 

Read more: Is it ok to cry?

I write children’s books about a potter and his vessels. Each story and vessel signifies spiritual truths and a part of my journey with Christ. Therefore, you can understand that I was intrigued by a vessel designed to hold tears.

The value of your tears

"You have kept track of all my sorrows; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book?"
Psalm 65:8 

During the time of Christ and ancient Roman times, tears were considered sacred. Many women carried a lachrymatory bottle that held their tears. They believed there was value in their tears because they knew that God saw every drop. They kept their tears because they knew God could hold all their sorrow. Do we believe that tears are still sacred? Likewise, what lesson do we teach our children when we tell them to stop crying? We need to show them that God welcomes our tears.

Teaching kids, it’s ok to cry.

As a principal, students would visit my office if they couldn’t stop crying at school. A favorite book I would read to them was What Am I Feeling? by Dr. Josh and Christi Straub. This Christian children’s book would help them identify their feelings and why they were crying. Another great new Christian children’s book is God; I Feel Sad: Bringing Big Emotions to a Bigger God. by Michelle Nietert and Tama Fortner. Crystal Bowman shared a review of this wonderful book here.

I’m sure you agree that teaching our children it is ok to cry is important. However, today’s Bible study reminded me that it is good when we shed tears too. Don’t hide from your kids the next time you feel like you’ll cry. When children see their teacher’s or parent’s tears, it allows them to build empathy. It makes room for healthy conversations about how Christ keeps count of our sorrows and pain. If we believe Christ will wipe away all tears, we must value theirs and teach them to esteem ours too.

What was the last thing in your life that made you want to cry? Did you hold back the tears? The story in Luke 7 made me realize that our crying can be anointing to Jesus’ love for us. This woman was unwanted and unwelcome at that event. However, Jesus wanted her there, and He wants to be with you even when it feels like no one else does. He allows us to feel marginalized so we know more about how much He loves us! So go ahead and cry!

By Dawn Stephens

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