Ten Tips for Family Unity
A family is a close-knit unit. As such there should be a sense of unity, a certain team spirit, if you will. But family unity does not happen on its own. It’s nurtured, grown, and fought for. So how does a family build this kind of camaraderie? Here are 10 tips to get you started.
- Play together.Make time to just have fun. Play board games, video games, or the Wii. Go to the park. Have silly contests. Laugh. Tickle. Go to a movie. Cook together. Share a hobby.
- Support one another’s interests.Go to each other’s plays, concerts, games, work picnics, and science fairs. Cheer each other on.
- Celebrate achievements.Or better yet, celebrate the person who achieved something. Let them know you’re proud of them and acknowledge their hard work.
- Pray for each other. Share needs with each other. Pray together as a family, as well as individually. Tell family members you’re praying for them.
- Be kind to each other. Say you’re sorry when you’re wrong. Say please and thank you. Share. Offer to help. Use common courtesy. Express appreciation. Let others go first. Build one another up. Don’t allow insulting humor or name calling.
- Stick up for each other–whether the person you’re sticking up for is there or not. Always have the backs of your family members.
- Eat together.At breakfast, hear what others have on their schedule that day. At dinner, let each person tell about their day. Ask open-ended questions like, “What was the best thing that happened to you today?” “The worst?” “Most surprising?” “Funniest?”
- Respect each other’s individual personalities. Some people are born talking, laughing, and commanding the room’s attention. Others are quiet, thoughtful, observant. Both are wonderful. Accept the different personalities in your family. Acknowledge the good parts of each one. Let everyone be themselves without judgment. Throw a compliment party where everyone shares one thing they love about each family member.
- Work together.Teamwork is often built during hard work, just as character is built through adversity. So paint the house together, do yard work, hold a garage sale, visit the sick, repair equipment, cook meals, clean the house. People, even young ones, need to feel needed and that they have a useful purpose within their family.
- Guard your family time. Life is busy. So make sure you carve out time simply to chill as a family. If you’re invited to an event, you don’t have to go just because nothing else is on the calendar. Reserve time to do nothing together. Even if you’re doing your own things in separate rooms, it’s nice to listen to the sounds of your family all under one roof at the same time.
Bonus tip: Come up with a phrase to say to your family members whenever they leave the house. It may become a hallmark of your family. A friend’s father used to tell them as they left, “Remember–you’re a Smith.” It carried a certain responsibility that they uphold their good family name while they were out with their friends.
Family unity often takes deliberate focus. You may want to have a family meeting and discuss what rules your family wants to live by. Then post them for all to see. Or list the characteristics you want your family to have, the kind of people you want to be for each other. When you see your kids living out your family creed, you’ll know it was worth the effort.
How does your family create a stong bond of unity? Which of these ideas would you like to put into practice? What’s a good hallmark phrase for your family?
Excellent post, Linda! What great tips. You hit the nail on the head. All families need this info.
Thanks, Crystal!
These are such good ideas, Linda. Sometimes parents just need a reminder to do the things that bring families closer together. When I dropped my kids off at school, I used to say, “I love you. Be good. Learn a lot.” That’s not necessarily something that builds family unity, but it was an expression of my affection and expectation of their behavior.
That’s a great “tagline” for sending your kids off, Andrea. I bet they’ll hear that in their heads and maybe even repeat it when they have kids to drop off some day. I do think things like that build family unity. Any little saying that is repeated regularly (like at bedtime, dropping off, returning home, etc.) becomes part of that family’s history. Visitors may not know to say the right phrase at the right time, so it’s definitely a family thing. That’s a part of family unity. 🙂 Thanks for sharing!
This is such a lovely post. Number 10 is something we struggle with around here, but I’ve begun scheduling family time into my daily planner so it isn’t as easily overlooked.
Thanks, Cheryl. I think our society makes #10 difficult, as well. We’re conditioned to do, be productive, be busy. We think if our calendar’s full, it means we’re living successful, productive lives. Not so. True success (at least for me) lies in the peace of my home. Down time is essential. Thanks for your comment.
This is wonderful. It describes the kind of family I wish I had grown up in. Young people and young parents need to read this in time to put these ideas to work in their own homes.
Thank you, Janice. Like most families, ours didn’t do these perfectly or consistently. But even if they’re done sometimes, it’s better than nothing.