Mo-om! I need a smart phone! I’m the only kid in class who doesn’t have one.
Besides, what if there’s an emergency? You want me to be safe, don’t you?

You do want your children to be safe. But it’s difficult to protect them against danger if they don’t know they need protecting. Dangers used to be tangible. Visible. Identifiable. Not anymore. Now they lurk in your child’s pocket—the same pocket that holds his or her smart phone.

First things first. You need to determine the right age for them to have a smart phone. That age is more dependent on their maturity than their school grade. While you may view the phone as a tool, your child views it as a status symbol and a ticket to acceptance by peers. They also wants to feel independent. Having a smart phone is one way to begin.

But do they have the maturity to abide by the limits you set? To have the self-discipline not to respond to spammers? The wisdom to not upload their personal data to potential stalkers?

Although children as young as eight years old do have phones, even Bill Gates, founder of Microsoft, thinks that’s too young. He didn’t allow his daughters to have a cell phone until they turned thirteen years old.

Once you have decided to give your child a smart phone, here’s what they need to know before you place the phone in their hands.

1. Privacy does not exist.

Children need to remember that privacy doesn’t exist with their peers. A photo taken by a friend in the locker room can easily be sent school-wide. Private texts can quickly become public with the click of a button.

A good rule would be to never text or send a message or photograph they wouldn’t want you to see.

2. Bad guys do exist.

Bad guys exist, but they don’t always wear a black hat and sport a handlebar mustache. Your children need to be discerning beyond their chronological age, which isn’t always realistic. So warn them about:

Cyber-bullying
Cyber-bullying can take many forms, including stalking through inappropriate texts, and displays of photos your daughter or son never gave permission to take.

Apps
Apps may seem innocent enough, but they cannot be trusted just because “everyone” downloaded it. Nothing is free…even a free app. The app provider will require something, including access to areas of her phone you may not be comfortable releasing. Claims of anonymity are easily circumvented. GPS tracking imbedded in some apps also enable predators to monitor your child’s location. For more information about dangerous apps, see Online Trends Parents Need to Warn Their Kids About – Part 1.

Inappropriate pictures and videos
Pictures and videos can be more than just embarrassing. In a moment of poor judgment, your children can either be a victim or a perpetrator. They need to understand that what can seem like a funny joke can have permanent consequences.

In Part 2 of this post on September 21st, I’ll review some boundaries you may want to consider when you give your children their first cell phone.

(Parts 1 and 2 of this article were originally written for Crosswalk.com)